Numbers 5

If you're an American, you probably remember learning in 5th grade history class about the Salem witch trials and some of the rather arbitrary tests used to determine whether one was a "witch" or not. One of the most notorious was the water test--the mob would throw the accused into a lake; if she floated, she was a witch, but if she sank and drowned, then she wasn't. But of course. And who could forget the Monty Python version of a witch trial?

The test for an unfaithful wife seems as arbitrary (though nowhere near as unfair) at first glance. Apparently, a delectable elixir of holy water and nutritious tabernacle floor dust (verse 17) effects some sort of psychosomatic reaction in the accused woman, making her womb barren if she has been unfaithful to her husband. However, God, not "magic," causes this reaction. And if the woman is indeed innocent, she gets off scot-free, presumably leaving her husband with an egg on his face.

But even if the woman is innocent of adultery, she still has to face her husband who was "jealous" enough to accuse in the first place (verse 14). I imagine that such an accusation would strain the couple's relationship--few people react with stars and rainbows when they've been publicly proved wrong, and even fewer react that way when their spouse has basically proclaimed their jealousy for all and sundry to see. I realize I'm viewing this through the lens of modern society, but I do hope that this law made men cogitate for a while before making their accusation.

Rather conspicuously, no test for an unfaithful husband exists. Men could get it on with more than one woman and no one would look upon them with contempt--remember Solomon and all his concubines? Of course, it would be foolish to think that God accepts adultery from men--He certainly had a thing or two to say about the whole David/Bathsheba affair. I'd like to think that the test for an unfaithful wife was also meant to protect innocent women from baseless accusations--after all, they did have a lot fewer rights. I'm afraid I can't write about this topic without being vicarious because I'm (a) not married, and (b) I haven't fooled around with anyone. That said, I'm a firm believer in the value of marriage, even with all its challenges, complications, and the occasional ludicrous moments.